New Zekeland

I want to get better so I can go back to work and get away from my parents. There was yelling about Kermit, a light, some radio station, and pink eye. Now my mother is running around playing a keyboard I recieved as a gift years ago. They both just barged into my room changing the TV to some station showing a product called alumalloy. My mother then proceded to create a theme song for alumalloy. Dear God in Heaven, please help me.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
apparently women have a book on how to anger me
Chapter 1: Angering Zeke by Making Bad Decisions
Chapter 2: Angering Zeke with Fake Pouting
Chapter 3: Angering Zeke with New Hairstyles
Chapter 4: Angering Zeke with Interesting Undergarments
Chapter 5: Angering Zeke with Lesbianism
Chapter 6: Angering Zeke with the Black Arts
Chapter 7: Angering Zeke with Dessert Toppings
Created by Brian Griffith

Scratch feeling better. I am still really sick.

Well, I feel a little better. Not 100% mind you, but better. Here's to another fruitful day.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"You better take care of me, Lord. If you don't you're gonna have me on your hands." Raoul Duke, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Bleh to being sick. I feel like crap.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"You drive. You drive. I think there's something wrong with me." Acosta, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Woke up this morning full of loathing and self doubt. I don't know if this Fraud Early Warning job is for me. I just really don't feel good about it. I will try to persevere and stick with it for awhile. Today, in training, we are scheduled to undergo our first evaluation. I will see how I perform and go from there. Hopefully all will be well and my confidence will be restored anonce. Maybe it is a case of perfomance anxiety. Maybe I am just getting depressed again. Seeing all the people up in the Burg just shows me what I still want in life. I should try to move on and find something else in life that makes me happy. I am confused and bewildered. I have no idea about anything anymore. I feel more lost than I ever have. I complain alot, but it really is a good life. I don't know why I feel like this more and more. I don't know if my brain and soul can take anymore. Only time will tell. I am not the only one with problems. Many of my friends also are experiencing turbulence in their lives as well. This weighs on me as well. Eh. What are you going to do? What am I going to do? I don't know.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die." Raoul Duke, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Murr to all that shit. I miss the Burg a whole lot.

Well another great weekend ends. Such a great time in the Burg. Despite all I can not remember, a grand time was had by all on Saturday night. The agenda included Gandalf's, The Outback Lounge, and then a theater party whose theme was Pimps and Hos. I was told I did a bit of yelling, a bit of kicking, was carrying around an inflated condom, that the grape taste I remember was lipstick that Sasha put on me, and I was upset over some sex noises. The whole night gets a little blurry after I left Outback. I don't know much of anything that went on, but I have some marvelous bruises thanks to Megan and her wicked mouth. She is the Devil. Pictures of these bruises and of the Sixth Floor Hos will be posted as soon as I get a scanner and the film developed.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"You know what I like? Mashed Potatoes." Zeke

Today's training highlight is the girl who sits in front of me. She has a marvelous ass. I don't know why I took so long to notice it. Oh, it is good. Superfine.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
" PLEASE! Tell me you got the fucking golf shoes." Raoul Duke, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Today was the third day of training. Highlights include getting a free frisbee, a free lanyard, and calculating that there are around 750 perforations in the ceiling speaker and around 800 in the tile that contains the speaker. Another fun day in Citiland.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
I love Big Brother, er, Citiland.

Well, I called Manpower. They said that my schedule was still the one that I asked for. Citicorp must have made a mistake somewhere. I will have to speak to my trainer today. Some of my anger is gone. But not all. I really want my Sunday through Thursday schedule. I don't want to work Tuesday through Saturday. They better straighten this out. And I better get MY schedule. Heads will roll if I don't. And the most likely head will be mine.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"Ah, devil ether. It makes you behave like the village drunkard in some early Irish novel. Total loss of all basic motor function. Blurred vision, no balance, numb tongue. The mind recoils in horror, unable to communicate with the spinal column. Which is interesting because you can actually watch yourself behaving in this terrible way, but you can't control it." Raoul Duke, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Anger. Rage. Hate. These are what I feel toward Manpower right now for possibly screwing me on my after training schedule. Oh, they will recieve an irate phone call later today. Oh yes they will. I haven't been this angry this sober in a very long time. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
They who drink beer will think beer.
Washington Irving

So very nervous. Bleh.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
Lost, lost! one moment knelled the woe of years.
Robert Browning

I don't want to go to work tomorrow. I want to continue life in the same way I have been living for months now. As long as I still have the internet. I am full of the nervous anxiety that used to only arrive with a new school year. Aud says it is the fact that I am starting a new job. I don't know. Change is coming. And I don't know what I am going to do. Well, anyway, I am going to worry for awhile and then try to get some sleep. It might be difficult tonight. Sleep always flees when I feel like this. But that sleep is still hours away. Adult Swim might take my mind off of my worries. But I am looking forward to this weekend and Tony's B-day celebration up in Frostburg. My thoughts are chaotic and so is my typing. I need a cigarette. Peace.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this: (this applies to something Aud and I were talking of)
Many a man fails to become a thinker for the sole reason that his memory is too good.
Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

http://www.chriswetherell.com/hobbit/

My Hobbit name is Grigory Brambleburr of Bindbale Wood

http://www.chriswetherell.com/elf/

My Elven name is Beren Silimaurë


To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"Do not meddle in the affairs of Wizards for they are subtle and quick to anger."

Rumors of a followup to Fear and Loathing pound in my brain. Can it be true? I hope to God Almighty that it is. I await the release of The Rum Diaries with bells on.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
Jack Sparrow: But why is the rum gone?!
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

Here is another outpouring from the depths of Zeke's Soul:

I have begun worrying that my friends in Frostburg will begin to see me as bugging them too much. Constant IMs and phone calls. Only after a stiff belt of bourbon do I realize why I have been doing this irritating practice. The weekend I spent up there illustrated to me the fact that I yearn to belong to them again. I miss being part of what they are. The endless hassles I give them are only bungling, unsuccessful attempts to reinsert myself into their group. Here, at home, when all my friends are away, the despair grows powerful. I become lost. Only my sleeping parents are with me, and one is more alone in the company of sleepers than at any other time. I try to define myself through their group. I need to belong to something. Maybe, when I finally start my job, I will feel acceptance. Some of that despair will be removed. Maybe, I need to realize that I am not part of that life anymore. That I am an outsider. That I have my own life and they theirs. That all concerned need to move on. I hate leaving people, just as I hate being left. I don't want to leave them. My overindulgent nature springs forward. I want their all. I want all their attention. As I also think in extremes, I wonder if I should abandon the Frostburgers to their fates. But I don't want that either. I desperately need balance in my life. I need to find a more moderate Zeke that walks the line between Frostburg and Hagerstown. I haven't been defined by Hagerstown in six years. Frostburg has been Zeke. I don't want to revert totally back to Mike either. Mike is a part of the past. He was a fun piece, but his time is over. Once again a balance needs to be sought. I am lost right now, drifting without aim. I am disoriented, I have lost my East. All my very clingy actions as of late have been fumbles toward some sort of definition in my life. Who am I now?

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
Bluto: "My advice to you is to start drinking heavily."
Otter: "Better listen to him, Flounder. He's pre-med."
National Lampoon's Animal House

While driving over to pick up Audrey to go run some errands, I decided I have no right to be sad. Just thinking about all the wonderful friends I have made over the years fills me with incredible warmth and love. I shouldn't be sad just because I leave them for a little bit. I know I will see them again, and if by some horrible mishap, I don't, I know I love them all and I am sure that they love me. I wish I could explain why I suddenly decided to be so sappy all of a sudden. Maybe it has something to do with Aud and Brian's comments on his site. That is a little of it. A majority springs from realizing what I have in common with my Frostburg friends, and from a most enlightening talk I had with Matt Green. A brief glimpse of his pov opened my eyes to the wonderful blessings that my friends are. I shouldn't be sad to leave them. I instead focus on the happiness that they bring into my life just by having known them. Well, I think that just about covers all my outpourings for right now. Btw, let me know what you think of my tinkering with the blog.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"Roly poly fish heads are never seen drinking cappuccino
at Italian restaurants with oriental women yeah."

Ahhh, behold the power of broadband. Cable Modem Good. What a great weekend I had in the 'Burg. I love everyone up there so much. I didn't realize how much I missed that sense of belonging that occurs there. Hugs and kisses to all. MUAH!!!

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"We are ill-prepared for the airborne ass-monkey problem." Jon Stewart, The Daily Show

Sometimes I wonder why i do this to myself. I don't think that I have the stamina to get drunk anymore. Last night sure put a hurting on me. I may not even go out again tonight. That is a wonder. I think my divinity has slipped away. I no longer feel like the local Bacchus. It is sort of scary. When did I get so old as to not enjoy drunkeness, or to at least let the hungover future get in the way of my alcoholic freedom? A question for the ages. I wonder when consequences entered my brain. When did I grow up?
Anyhoo, I finally remembered where those chairs I detest are located. The Outback Lounge in the 'Burg.
And oh yeah, I finally got a job. The adventures of Unemployed Man now come to end. But we don't know if UM has left for good or only taken a hiatus. Stay tuned to discover UM's fate.

To end this reading of the Gospel According to Zekius, I leave you with this:
"The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades."

Stupid blog. GRRRRR. I mad now. Eating my post. Saying it was saved and then not letting me find it. GRRRR.


No gospel today.